Cannabis

The Unquiet Dark

dark

I wish we didn’t need to sleep. Sleep is a bothersome thing and even though I stay in bed until ~2pm on weekends, I really wish I didn’t.

You see I have a problem with sleeping. If I haven’t had a smoke before bed, I will lie there for hours whilst my mind races. Last night it took me about three hours to drift off. I went to bed at midnight, had to get up at six thirty, grand total of three and a bit hours sleep.

Getting the right amount of sleep is important for depressed people.

Too little sleep and you are ratty and irritated all day, which may sound like no big deal but when you add in the depression and anxiety factor simply being irritated takes on a whole new fucking level. Think of what you are like when you are mildly irritated by something such as a crying child or that bastard on the bus who plays his music so loud you can hear everything coming from his headphones. Now take that mild annoyance, multiply by infinity, and then let it bend you over the table and fuck you in the ass. I am not being over dramatic here, depression is a synergistic illness. Any mental state is made exponentially worse when you already loathe yourself and can’t figure out why.

Conversely, too much sleep and you feel like shit when you wake up both physically and mentally. You have wasted your day yet again in bed, further reinforcement (as if you needed any more) that you are a looooooser.

So, we are presented with a problem. Smoke weed and sleep, or go straight and don’t.

The worst part is that whilst you are alone with your thoughts in the dark, with your chattering, seemingly never ending stream of what ifs coursing through your every neuron, things look uglier. The positive things you have tried to make sense of during the day get tainted by the darkness and take on new aspects, things you never considered before. It’s hard to explain in words but as an example I can read a part of my Buddhism book during my lunch hour and be completely on board with the “be compassionate to all” tenet and actually feel good about myself for wanting to aligned more to positive feelings. However in the unquiet dark, with so much information blasting through my brain at almost the speed of light, things get muddled and corrupted. ‘Compassion? to everyone? fuck no, there are idiots out there who deserve my invective and deserve to be punished – FUCK compassion’

It’s another aspect of depression I hate. It makes you change your mind way too often. I can be full of positivity about how I can better myself one minute and then someone flicks a switch and literally the next minute I have to deride myself for thinking like such a sap.

In a word:

fuuuuuuu

Fuck sleep, lets evolve away from this already, all it does is get in the way of progress! Damn my bed is comfy though…

f.

 

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Be cool like Carl, and keep your hands off my science

My suit is made of SCIENCE

Carl Sagan was one of the greatest people who ever lived. Like ever. Seriously.

Not only was he a badass scientist (astrophysics, cosmology, astronomy etc) and science populariser, he was also a cannabis advocate and all around CHILL DUDE. He currently holds the world record for cheesiest yet sincere grin:

"Tee hee, science!"“I fucking LOVE science dawg”

In 1980 two great things happened. One, I was born and two, Carl Sagan started broadcasting his show Cosmos: A Personal Voyage on television. Cosmos was a thirteen part science based documentary show, chronicling science’s greatest achievements throughout the existence of the human race. Even though it’s over thirty years old it is still well worth watching today, not just for the science but also for Sagan himself. His amazingly calm and dreamy voice makes learning seem like pure pleasure and his empathy for all living things was something to be admired. He did so much for science that I can’t even begin to scratch the surface so you should go and at least read his wiki page, I guarantee that you’ll like what you read.

Carl Sagan died in 1996 and the world lost one of the greatest defenders of truth it has ever known. However just as the memory of Carl lives on today, so does his show Cosmos in a reboot of sorts being presented by one of today’s leading science populariser guys, Neil deGrasse Tyson.

ndgtThis guy. His head is just a bit smaller than Jupiter.

So far there have been three episodes of the new Cosmos that have aired, I’ve seen the first two and NDT does a brilliant job of carrying on Sagan’s legacy. You can tell he is just as excited about spreading knowledge and science as Carl was, and he pays homage to his mentor in a most respectful and touching manner in the first episode.

It’s a great programme and something that is badly needed these days; a science show about science and nothing else. But of course, you start to talk about Evolution and then BAM – the crazies come out of the woodwork:

Creationists want equal airtime on Cosmos

That’s right folks we cannot have a science based show that is just about pure science without those loveable bunch The Creationists throwing their extremely uneducated and tiresome opinions and objections into the mix. They want Cosmos to talk about the non theory that is Intelligent Design and how Creationism is a legitimate subject that should be taught as a science to children. This is idiotic. This is like watching Battlestar Galactica and complaining that there are not enough cowboys in it. It’s like listening to classical music and moaning that there is no dubstep style drop in the middle of the track.

You do no get to complain about this, fundamentalist religious people. You have entire channels, no scratch that, entire NETWORKS dedicated to god bothering. You would laugh in the face of anyone who demanded that you give Evolution equal time on one of your “Praise Jesus by giving us all your money” shows now would you?

Leave the science to the scientists and push your own silly agendas on your extremely well financed cable TV channels. Cosmos is about Science, not your false mythos. Evolution is not ‘just a theory’ and if you still cling to that belief then get a dictionary and actually look up what the term ‘theory’ means in a scientific context. The theory of Evolution is FACT, not a hypothesis. There are thousands of pieces of evidence and thousands of peer reviewed studies that prove it and refute Creationism at every turn.

Please, I know I’m not a massive fan or religion and a lot of what I say is hyperbole but I want nothing more than to accept religion as something that certain people do and get some good out of. It may not be my cup of tea but if it influences your life and the lives of those you care about in a positive manner, great – that is a good thing and you can believe whatever you want. However if your beliefs are dangerous, if you spread lies and misinformation and hatred and bigotry, you make it very hard for me to tolerate you.

jesus_and_the_dinosaursThis never happened

Cosmos is currently broadcasting on Sunday nights on FOX in the states and on Sky1 here in the UK. I highly recommend you watch it. In the meantime here is a cool little music video that features both Carl Sagan and NDT as well as a host of other important scientists (Feynman, Nye and more!).

Enjoy The Symphony Of Science – We Are All Connected (and it’s true, we are).

f.